The “field with one element” is an interesting algebraic object that in some sense relates linear algebra with set theory. In a much deeper vein it is also expected to have a role in algebraic geometry that could potentially “lift" Deligne’s proof of the final Weil Conjecture for varieties over finite fields to a proof of the Riemann hypothesis for the Riemann zeta function. The only problem is that it doesn’t exist. In this highly speculative talk I will discuss some of these concepts, and focus mainly on zeta functions of algebraic varieties over finite fields. I will give a (very) brief sketch of how to interpret various zeta functions in a geometric context, and try to explain what goes wrong for the Riemann zeta function that makes this a difficult problem.